Lawyers are expensive because you get a lot for your money. You get someone who will abandon their precious supercar — or regular car — in rising flood waters so he can attend your hearing. You get someone who will lose sleep worrying about your legal problem so you can finally get some rest.
Or, as my Civil Procedure professor put it: Lawyers are like garbage men: we take your problems, put them away for you, so you don't have to do it yourself. He liked to use graphics and props in class, so sometimes he had a toaster, stuffed animal, garbage bag (or maybe I am misremembering that part, it was 9am on a Sunday when I took that class), or other thing to demonstrate what he was explaining. I didn't score very high in that class but I do remember a lot of it quite well, thanks to his graphics and explanations.
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